The Battle for Nintendo's Mascot!
by Link
Summary: Link & America's Favortie furry little thunder mouse feel that Mario is just too old to be Nintendo's mascot. So they take it out in a free-for-all brawl! for smash bros fans. Please R&R!!!


Rally Ho, Gameplayerz

Rally Ho, Gameplayerz!

Yet another fic by the one (well actually there are about 5), the onlyTHE GREAT

LINK!!!!!!!

"Yipee! Yahoo! Wa-ha! All-a the coins-a in-a the world-a! I'm rich! He hee! Ha ha!"

"Mario? I need-a, I mean, need a word with you." Mario looked to see who his visitor was.

"Ah! Link! Come-a in! Sit a-down." Link entered Mario's castle and looked around.

"Where-a, I mean, where am I supposed to sit?" Link asked.

"Why-a, on-a the floor-a, of course!"

"Ok, Mario, you can drop the accent! I've played Super Mario 64, and I've heared you say, ungh,' and I know-a, ARGH! I _know_ that you're accent is fake."

"Why-a, of course-a it's not! I was born in Italy, and I this-a accent isn't-a fake!"

"Well, could you at least-a CRAP!!! Could you at least cut the —a? It's getting on my nerves."

"No-a! Once-a you start, you can't a-stop!" Mario said.

Link narrowed his eyes. "Well, that's not why I came. On my web page, I put up a poll to see who is the best Nintendo mascot, you or me. It's 100% for me, 0% for you."

"Did you put-a Pikachu?"

"Yes, and it was 0 for him, too," Link said.

"I see." Mario took out his laptop. "Well-a let me see." Mario typed in [http://www.link.com][1]. "L3 communications? Are you sure this is-a your web page?"

"Uh"

"This-a is your web page, right?" Mario asked suspiciously.

"Ok! Ok! My web page is [http://www.angelfire.com/anime/link86][2]"

"Hahaha! You don't have a domain name? You use Angelfire-a?"

"Be quiet. It's not funny," Link mumbled.

"Ok, ok. Let's see. Here's your poll" Mario voted for himself. The poll changed from 100% for Link and 0% for Mario to 50% for Link and 50% for Mario. "Haha! My vote was the second! There was only one vote! Link, you did the only vote!" Mario laughed.

"Be quiet," Link mumbled. "Ok, Anyway, I challenge you to a duel. A duel to see who is the best of the best. The winner get's to be mascot of Nintendo."

"But-a, we already-a did this in-a Super Smash-a Bros,"

"Well, were doing it again! We will fight were no one has an advantage, no one has a disadvantige. We shall duelon Planet Zebes."

"Oh-a no! Is that the place-a in Super-a Smash Bros, with the lava and" Link nodded. "Oh no!"

That's when Pikachu came in.

"Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi!

"Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika! Pika pika! Pika pi, pi pika pi chu! Pika pika chu, chu chu pi pika! Pikachu! Pika pi! Pika pika! Pika pi! Pi pika! Chu pi pika!"

Mario looked at Link. Link shrugged.

"Yo! Could we get a transalator in here?" Toad, Keapora Geabora, and Professor Elm all came in at once.

"Yes?" They said.

An hour later, everything was straightend out. Mario, Link, and Pikachu were to have a duel on Planet Zebes the next day. They all started there at once. Link played his Ocarina (Sonatina of Zebes), Mario jumped into a painting (Still Life with Zebes), and Pikachu hopped in a pelacin's mouth (uhhis name was Henry.). Two hours later, they were all there.

"Wait a minutewhere are my fairies, milk, potions, and Chateu Romani?"

"Where-a are my caps?"

Pikachu justed walked around, whistling innocently.

"Oh, you ******* *******!" Link yelled. Out of no where he snatched a Pokeball and threw it at Pikachu. It smaked Pikachu on the head and knocked him out. Link reached into Pikachu's pocket (he was wearing khakis.) and pulled out his bottles with milk, potions, fairies, and Chatau Romani. And then he pulled out Mario's 3 caps, the wing cap, the metal cap, and the vanish cap. Link looked around, and saw that Mario was in the bathroom. He thought the metal cap looked especially cool, and so he took of his red hat (knowing that Mario had fireballs, he camed prepared with his Goron tunic) and put on the metal cap.

Suddenly, he turned into metal. "Whoa, cool!" He ran around for a while, smashing things with extrodinary power, and then the cap began to fade. He quickly took it of, and the cap didn't dissapear. That's when he got an idea. He put the metal cap back on, and immedeatly it started to fade. He took off the cap, and grinned.

Link put on every cap unitill they started to fade. Now, when Mario put them on, he would have a very short time to use them.

"MWA HA HA HA! MWA HA HA HA HA HA HAH AH HAH AH HHAH HA HAH AH HAHHAHAHH!!!!!!!!!!! MWA HA HAH HAHA HAH HAH HAH HA HAHH AH HAHHA HAH HA HHAH HA HAHH *choke choke cough cough* I'm ok."

While Link went to bed, Mario snuck outside and talked to Samus, who was walking around for no reason (after all, this was her planet). "Hey, Samus," Mario said in his REAL non-Italian voice.

"Yeah, Mario?"

"You know about the contest tommorow, right?"

"You still watch Seinfeld?" Samus asked, looking at him quizically.

"No, no, the contest for mascot."

"Oh, yeah," Samus said.

"I was wonderingyou'll be in the audince, right?"

"Sure," she said.

"Well, could you shoot Pikachu? He's so annoying, and I just wanted to get him out of my face."

"Gladly."

"Hehehe"

Not only did Link and Mario have a plan to whoop ass, Pikachu also had some Pokeballs he was planning to bomb Link with. After all, he did knock Pikachu out.

Finally, it was the day of the contest. There was a huge audince, which included Ash, Zelda, and Peach.

"Readygo!!" The announcer yelled. Pikachu, being the fastest, immedeatly started off with shoking Link. He quicky drew his mirror shield and deflected the attack to Mario, who quickly put on his vanish cap. It lasted about half a second, not enough to protect Mario.

"Ahhhhhh!" Mario yelled as he got zapped. He chucked a fireball at Link, who jumped it, and did the jump attack on Mario. The fireball hit Pikachu. Pikachu flew back, but quickly landed and tossed a Pokeball at Link.

"Hey! Pikachu! Those are mine!" Ash yelled at him. Pikach gave Ash the finger, and Ash fell down sobbing.

The Pokeball opened up, and out came a Charizard, who flamethorwered Link.

Since Link's hearts were very low from that, there was an annoying beeping noise. The audience all shuddered at the high pitch.

Link drank his potion, the beeping stopped, and everyone was happy. Then, Link drank his Chateau Romani, and used Din's Fire on Pikachu.

"Pika pika!" Pikachu yelled. Mario kicked Link in the back of the head. Link spun around, used the Megaton hammer, and squashed Mario.

"Mumma mia!" he yelled.

"Go to hell!" Link yelled as he slashed Mario with his sword. Then Pikachu came flying out of nowhere, and headbutted Link. He fell down, and Mario attack Pikachu with a fireball. Pikachu used thunderbolt on Mario, but Link stood up and got shocked instead of Mario.

Link put up Nayru's Love, and started shooting Mario with Light Arrows like mad.

"Oof! Ow! Owowowow!" Link didn't notice Pikachu taking Link's hookshot from him.

From the audince, Samus saw Pikachu take out the hookshot to hit Mario with, since he was screwed already. Samus charged up her blaster shot, and at the same time Pikachu fired the hookshot through Link's legs and hit Mario in the stomach and stuck. Samus fired, which hit Pikachu, who went flying, although he was still holding on to the hookshot, so Mario flew up in the air, too, and rammed Link in the stomach, who also went flying.

So here you have this electric mouse, holding on to a chain with an Italian plumer on the other end, and with and elf wearing a red hat way too close to him. They all went flying, and almost landed in the lava, but Pikachu threw a Pokeball, and out came Pidgeotto, who flew Pikachu to safty. Link put on Nayru's Love again, and then used the hover boots to make it to safety. Mario put on the wing cap, but, since Link had used it, he cap dissapeared, Mario fell in the lava, and his last words were, "Samus, you basta"

"Whad did he say?" Samus asked Fox, who was sitting next to her.

"Uh, I think he said, Samus, you b*****d,'" Fox answerd.

"Did you just call me a b*****d? You b*****d!!"

"I didn't call you a b*****d, you asked what Mario said andAHHHHHHH!" Samus punched Fox and he flew off to Terimina where the moon crushed him.

Now, it was Pikachu vs. Link.

Link put on Nayru's Love once more, and chucked a bomb at Pikachu. He jumped it, and threw it at Princess Ruto, who caught it, and threw it to Yoshi, who ate it and blew up.

"YOSHI!!!"

"Mumma mia!" cried Luigi, who was sitting in the audince. Luigi ran to Yoshi.

"DOWN IN FRONT!" Waluigi yelled.

"SHUT UP!" Wario screamed.

The battle conintued.

After a while, Nayru's Love went off again, and so Link was about to use it again, when, BAM! A Pokeball smaked Link in ther forehead, and he fell down. Out of the Pokeball popped out a Snorlax.

"Pika! Pika pi, PIKA!!!!!"

"Snooooooooooore!!" Snorlax jumped up in the air, and cast a HUGE dark shadow amongst Link.

"Ulp." Then the Lens of Truth fell out of Link's tunic and landed on his eye. "Hey! This isn't a Snorlax! This is a man in a suit!"

Link rolled out of the way, the "Snorlax" hit the ground, and the costume fell off to show a trembling small man.

"I'm not a bad man, I'm just a bad wizard" he croaked.

"O-_KAY_" said Link, and he tossed the man on top of Kirby, who was just about to suck in popcorn, but instead the old man fell in. Kirby choked and popped like a bafoon, I mean, balloon.

Link shot an ice arrow and Pikachu, who immedatly froze in an icecube. Link planted a bomb at the ice. Pikachu unfroze, looked at the bomb, which BLEW UP and Pikachu flew away to the inosphere.

Link started doing his victory dance immedatly. The Link supporters (Rauru, Saria, Daurina, Ruto, Impa, Naburoo, and Zelda) went into a chant, shouting, "Go Link! Go Link!" That's when Princess Ruto and Princess Zelda got on the battle field and startedfighting.

"Girl, the boy is mine."

"Nuh-uh. He mine, girlfriend."

"Don't you girlfriend me!"

"Oh, that right, cus you ain't got no allaby! You ugly!"

"Yeah, well at least I don't spell cuz cus'."

"Girl, I'm gonna smack you upside yo head."

"You'm best smack youself."

"Girl, what'ch you want?"

"Whach you want yoself, sister."

"I ain't yo sista, so you'm best shut up."

"Well you'm best be gone."

"Well, you'm best be dead."

"Girl, shut up."

"Whach you want?"

Link sloooooowly backed away, put he fell of the planet, into the lava, and got barbequed. Extra crispy.

"I NOW ANNOUNCE LINKwait, where'd Link go? I was reading Archie. Haha, he said pizza. That Jughead cracks me up. Hyuck hyuck. Well, those two women are reamaing, so I guess they are the winners. What are their names?" the announcer asked. Then Princess Zelda shoved Ruto off the planted and she died. "Oh, that's right, her name's Mairo. Ok. MARIO IS NINTENDO'S MASCOT."

And that's why, even though Link is better than him, Mario is still Nintendo's mascot to this day. Why didn't Ness tell him Zelda's name was Link? Oy, oy, oy.

A/N: Weeeeeeeeellthat's the problem with stories. You type and type and type and type and typeyou type a lot and then find it's only 3 pages, andwait a minute 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 66???? Whoa! 6 pages! Gee, time flies! Well, there goes my Oscar-qualityno, it's not that goodEW! It's not THAT badGolden Globe-quality speech. Ach it took me like 5 minutes to write that thing! RRRRRGH! Krmflgrflxcrmblmbxrgfdsmdo I have to do acnowledgements? I'd rather not. I guess I'll just name screw ups in the Zelda intruction books. On page 22 of the OoT book, kid Link has the Master Sword (very hard to see), and in the MM book, on some Z-Targeting page, there is a pic of Link stabbing, and "Attack" is in Japanese. Just wanted to point that out.

The reason I wrote this is because I am always doing Smash Bros. themes, such as PokeMon vs. Mario, or FFA Mario cast, (Mario, Luigi, D.K., Yoshi) you know stuff like that. AND on fanfiction.net, I read "Destinies Unite" by Gameboyguru (the 2nd best ff.net author, I'm #1) and realizedI HAVE NEVER WRITTTEN A CROSSOVER BEFORE! And here I start to have a nervous brake down and say "I MUST WRITE A CROSSOVER!!!!! Auuuuuugh!" and then I drool down my T-shirt, even though it's December. Aaaaaaaand I am always thinking about "Link should be Nintendo mascot!! Not Mario! Not Pikachu! Why isn't Link mascot?? Why, why, WHY??????" so I put these ideas toghether and get this story. I'm taking too long aren't I? 2 PARAGRAPHS??? Ooops, that's longer than my origanal Golden Globe-quality speech. UhI need to close with something dramatic, SO I shall say my favorite quote:

"I think, therefore, I am." Oh, it's 7 pages!!!! Might as well finish this OK well there has to be a Zelda movie. It would be so sweet! I'd get to play kid Link, I'm just perfect for that part. I mean, come on! There's a Mario movie and 3 PokeMon movies, why not Zelda? There should also be a Metroid move, that would be sweet! And a Star Fox movie! But a Kirby and Yoshi move? Nooooo, that would suck. Ooh, ooh, a Perfect Dark movie!!! That would be the best! And a Jet Force Gemini movie! And, and, and, a Wario and Waluigi movie would be stupid, but who cares????? AAAAAAAAAAAAND a James Bond movie!! That would be so cool!!! I mean come on, Goldeneye is just perfect for a movie! And a Tomb Raider movie, even though she's playstation (RRRRRRRGH). OK, for the last 2 I was kidding, ok? Wow, this is really boring. I'm outta here!!

   [1]: http://www.link.com/
   [2]: http://www.angelfire.com/anime/link86



End file.
